So you've handed him the broom & explained the cobwebs bit.
As he's lifting the broom to do it, and you're swinging that punch, he's turning on his heels to look at the indicated corners.
At which point your "attacker" gets clubbed *on the back of the head* and making any Court Martial Procedings filled with the Doc's evaluation of $Idiot's injuries "sustained while in a non combative stance".
Kiss your career goodbye Sarge, because you've just assaulted someone, attempted to Lie Under Oath to cover it up, and have several witness' that can testify to the fact that $Idiot had made no such attack.
And that's if you're lucky & land the punch.
If $Idiot isn't the idiot you've made him out to be, you've just handed him a weapon with which he can defend himself.
A quick side-snap and that broomstick breaks off upside your skull, and it'll be a close call as to which hits the floor first: that broken bit of broom, or your face.
And it's all auto-reflex, those SAME reflexs' the Service has drilled into him for HOW many years?
Sure, you're old & tough & can throw a punch like a freight train, but even a "98 pound weakling" can lay your sad a3 out with a simple polearm to the groin.
At which point $Idiot yells "That was Self Defense! He attacked me!" and uses your own witness' to land your butt in the clink.
So, good job.
Ruin your career because you can't be bothered to do the paperwork that's part of your job?
*Golf Clap*
Bravo, Bubba, Bravo.
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