| Just closed my facebook account. |
by Baenlynn |
2012-12-13 03:21:54 |
So tired of all the email spam even after changing all the settings, even after I had told them time and again not to send me. Even flagging it all as spam in gmail I was STILL having some slip through the filter.
Here is my final response to them (Edited for language of course):
Dear facebook:
I hate you.
I hate you I hate you I hate you so much it's turning cancerous. I told you MONTHS ago to stop sending me emails every time someone I might know who's dimly connected to someone I met once back in high school posts about how they've just had a bowel movement but you just won't listen.
I have EVERY possible option for notifications turned off and yet STILL you keep sending me this endless broken sewerage line of wasted bits. I have told my email provider to flag every bit of dreck from you as SPAM and STILL it keeps coming. The volume of crap coming my way from facebook still manages to outnumber every other piece of spam by a factor of three to one, and still the totally worthless spamfest deluge keeps coming.
I want you to delete my account. I want it gone. I want O.U.T. spells OUT. I am not a social networking person, I would MUCH rather connect with people I know directly or at least through a medium that affords some measure of taste, decorum, and privacy; still managing to preserve some sense of boundary between my inner monologue and the entire rest of the universe. NOT whinging about every time I stub my toe, or making vielled passive-aggressive comments about people who anger me to the point of seeing red but I don't have the stones to personally confront. I do not need to let everyone know with a form-letter post about how I like 'XYZ' because if I REALLY wanted to share all of that with people I WOULD F4ING TALK ABOUT IT WITH THEM LIKE A B6 HUMAN BEING AND NOT STAND ON SOME GLORIFIED DIGITAL SOAPBOX BANGING ON AND ON AND ON ABOUT YOCTO-SCALE MINUTIAE LIKE IT WAS IMPORTANT TO THE FATE OF HUMANITY.
As to the emotional blackmail up the top with the line of friends who will 'miss me' These are people I talk to on a regular basis through other media, so you can shove that sideways up your collective (*extended metaphor for the posterior*) and jiggle it around until it perforates something.
How dare you! HOW DARE YOU! A faceless agglomeration of evil, soulless, heartless, tactless, mindless, money-grubbing, commercial w5s who mine people's personal information for profit and sell to the highest bidder, attempt to use the human connection as a leash through which to hold me. Speaking about my relationships with other human beings as though my leaving your verbal toilet were a form of suicide. What piece of your brain did they cut out on employee orientation day to make THAT little gem seem like a good idea? Are you proud of yourselves? Is THIS the reason why you work in cubicles, because your bloated, fat, ego-driven heads can't fit through a regular f4ing door?
And the endless amount of useless 'tips' under reasons for leaving are beyond a joke. If it has gotten to this point that I am wanting to leave, and I have taken all your 'helpful hints' to heart, then by this point, your sorry excuses for sorry excuses are beyond a joke. Were I capable of laughing about ANY of this I'd probably give myself a hernia. I have received less passive-aggressive communication from crazy ex-girlfriends, and there was ONE who wanted to personally murder all my former partners with a blunt knife.
And with THAT, I have decided that I am going to end this bile dump the way I had originally intended. I lost some steam about halfway through when common sense started to kick in, but the comparison is apt, and my original rush to judgement isn't that far off the mark, so here it is.
In short my reason for leaving facebook is thus:
I'm afraid that I'm just not that much of a w4er, so kindly take your cult of f4tards and go die in a fire.
Sincerely: One SERIOUSLY disgruntled ex user |
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[ Reply ] |
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I don't get any mails from facebook | by Spisefisken | 2012-12-13 03:36:32 |
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Well now I don't either :-) (n/t) | by Baenlynn | 2012-12-13 03:40:10 |
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Yeah, I don't get any emails either | by Concept | 2012-12-13 05:00:14 |
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I don't either. | by morenna | 2012-12-13 06:29:36 |
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Me, either. Never have. (n/t) | by Twitchh | 2012-12-13 11:15:03 |
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I get them, I just don't see them. | by wwill | 2012-12-13 20:46:51 |
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You will, most likely, get a message back in the l | by Klaranth | 2012-12-13 03:40:10 |
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It is worse! | by ideur | 2012-12-13 04:40:32 |
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A German student filed a lawsuit against Facebook | by kreedah | 2012-12-13 06:54:45 |
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there used to be a firefox extension | by Nightwind | 2012-12-13 11:51:21 |
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thank you for your final email | by Klymer | 2012-12-13 03:44:34 |
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facecrook can burn brightly in Hades. | by themadkansan | 2012-12-13 03:45:13 |
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Actually, what you SHOULDve done, | by Klaranth | 2012-12-13 03:52:05 |
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But that would make a liar of me. | by Baenlynn | 2012-12-13 04:06:02 |
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And that neatly summarizes why I never joined (n/t) | by PeKaJe | 2012-12-13 04:07:23 |
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Let me show you the 10-foot pole I carry | by pas51 | 2012-12-13 07:19:07 |
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I only just started using mine | by joecrouse | 2012-12-13 05:08:35 |
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Would you be my facebook friend? | by TrogL | 2012-12-13 06:46:43 |
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o/` It's a beau-ti-ful day in the intarweb o/` (n/t) | by kahuana | 2012-12-13 16:17:17 |
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only | by Klymer | 2012-12-13 06:54:49 |
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They tried. | by firehawk | 2012-12-13 20:42:37 |
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Odd. I don't get any spam from them. | by AndyA | 2012-12-13 09:46:13 |
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The only spam I get supposedly from FB | by corwin17 | 2012-12-13 10:07:37 |
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That won't be read by anyone at FB. | by kahuana | 2012-12-13 16:08:46 |
