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Parental rights | by Pyralis | 2008-07-10 09:25:12 |
| There are *far* too few facts to say either way |
by ag__wyvern |
2008-07-10 09:58:29 |
"witnesses at a Fourth of July parade told police she disciplined her 2-year-old daughter in too harshly."
- What is meant by 'too harshly'? (the insert refers to spanking) Bear in mind that this is a two year old child.
"Capt. Ron Clark of the Coeur d'Alene Police says eight witnesses signed statements that 21-year-old Melissa Farrell caused injury to her child."
- *8* people actually signed statements? Okay, were they all in the same family or all members of a like-minded group, or are these a random batch of people who happened to see the mother going overboard in smacking her kid?
"Farrell denies she hurt her daughter while preventing her from possibly running into the parade route. She says she's being targeted for punishing her child in a way that's contrary to the beliefs of those who complained to police."
- Did the mother not have the kid under control, or did the kid get caught up in excitement and run into the road? Were they in lawn chairs in an open area, or were they in a crowd on the side of the street? Would it have made more sense to take the kid out of the situation (leave the parade viewing)? What are the beliefs of those who complained to police? (see earlier question about 'group' vs. individuals)
"Clark says the officer who issued the citation reported no visible signs of injury to the child. "
- What was the actual punishment? A swat to the bum (possibly through diapers) that says "hey! stop it!", or repeated hard smacks? In either case, there might not be injuries. Was there any shaking? You won't see visible signs of that either. Was there sharp hoisting by the arm? Might not see that either.
As for parental rights... I don't think I particularly like that term. Rather, I prefer 'parental responsibility'. Parents have the responsibility to attempt to ensure the good behaviour of their kids, and to raise them to understand and acknowledge the concepts of right and wrong. They have the responsibility to use *appropriate* discipline. I can see, for some parents and their children, that spanking is appropriate, and by 'spanking' I mean *spanking*, not thrashing. Too many people defend aggressive spanking with the rationale that "My parents used the strap on me and I turned out all right" - that speaks wonders for the speaker, but doesn't justify the abuse by the parents.
Parents do *not* have the right to abuse their kids.
For what it's worth... we *never* had to spank our kid, and he turned out fine. We used other methods - primarily, we *talked* with our kid and took the time to solve issues, rather than enforce our will through the quick expedient of a smack in the butt.
Oh yeah... when he was two and a half or so, I took him to a Gymboree session (or something like that, I forget the details). Afterwards, we caught the bus home - long wait for the bus, hot day, cranky/tired kid. Got on the bus, sat down and he just *lost* it - full on crying/thrashing.
At this point, all spanking would do is make things worse. I did my best to keep him under control (restrained him from thrashing without hurting him), tried to calm him down as best as I could. I was going to get off the bus early, but the other passengers (not crowded) weren't upset - they saw I was trying. Now, anybody who got on the bus after me without seeing what was going on could easily have assumed I was hurting the kid and called the authorities.
I recognized this while on the bus. And I also knew that if that happened, I wouldn't blame the people who complained. Because they were watching out for *my* kid. That's a good thing.
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[ Reply ] |
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While I appreciate your attempt to remain neutral, | by firehawk | 2008-07-10 10:48:20 |
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I add, here is someone who was spanked occasionaly | by confused.brit | 2008-07-10 10:56:36 |
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No worries. | by ag__wyvern | 2008-07-10 10:57:53 |
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Yes, I pretty much agree with you on all points. (n/t) | by firehawk | 2008-07-10 11:01:45 |
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The way I see it, spanking is a last resort. | by Phoon | 2008-07-10 11:07:55 |
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The hot stove one... | by ag__wyvern | 2008-07-10 12:33:29 |
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Not always an option. | by Phoon | 2008-07-10 14:31:07 |
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if only it were used as a last resort | by morenna | 2008-07-10 15:19:33 |
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