| Found this gem hidden on textfiles.com:
"HOW THEY BABYLON!"
Waitress: Hawaii, Mister? You must be Hungary.
Gent: Yes, Siam. And I can't Rumania long, either. Venice lunch ready?
Waitress: I'll Russia table. What are you Ghana Havre? Aix?
Gent: You want Tibet? I prefer Turkey. Can Jamaica cook step on the Gaza bit?
Waitress: Odessa laugh! Alaska, but listen for her Wales.
Gent: I'm not Balkan. Just put a Cuba sugar in my Java.
Waitress: Don't you be Sicily, big boy. Sweden it yourself. I'm only here to Serbia.
Gent: Denmark my check and call the Bosphorus, Egypt me. There's an Eire. I hope he'll Kenya. I don't Bolivia know who I am!
Waitress: Canada noise! I don't Caribbean. You sure Ararat!
Gent: Samoa your wisecracks? What's got India? D'you think this arguing Alps business? Why be so Chile? Be Nice!
Waitress: Don't Kiev me that Boulogne! Alemain do! Spain in the neck. Pay your Czech and don't Kuwait. Ayssinia!
Gent: I'll come back with my France and Taiwan on Zanzibar is open. (to himself)
---SPOILER ALERT! --- Don't read further if you want to figure it out on your own! I tried to translate into common English:
How they babble on!
Waitress: How are you, Mister? You must be hungry.
Gent: Yes, I am. And I can't remain long, either. When is lunch ready?
Waitress: I'll rush a table. What are you gonna have? Eggs?
Gent: You want, I bet? I prefer turkey. Can you make your cook step on the gas a bit?
Waitress: Oh that's a laugh! I'll ask her, but listen for her wails.
Gent: I'm not balkin'. Just put a cube of sugar in my Java.
Waitress: Don't you be silly, big boy. Sweeten it yourself. I'm only here to serve ya.
Gent: Then mark my check and call the boss for I see you trapped me. There's an error. I hope he'll can ya. I don't believe ya know who I am!
Waitress: Can the noise! I don't care a bean. You sure are a rat!
Gent: Some of your wisecracks? What's got into ya? D'you think this arguing helps business? Why be so chilly? Be nice!
Waitress: Don't give me that bullying! All the men do! 's pain in the neck. Pay your check and don't you wait. I'll seeing ya!
Gent: I'll come back with my friends and tie once when the bar is open. (to himself)
Not quite sure about Odessa, Balkan, Egypt, Canada, Caribbean, Boulogne and Zanzibar. It's an interesting way to shorten texts - not as short as TXT SPK, but looks way more sophisticated ;) |
