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Long distance relationships? | by etwas_egal | 2007-09-23 20:21:07 |
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It's hard. But not impossible. | by purplepineapple | 2007-09-23 21:05:53 |
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Lava pit number one identified! | by etwas_egal | 2007-09-23 21:21:56 |
| Sure! |
by purplepineapple |
2007-09-23 21:29:51 |
:)
Video calls are the best thing to help with this pit. I didn't have that in my first LD (we were both still on dial-up...this was back in 2001). Second time around, we did, but we just didn't try hard enough overall, I think. And we were both very much in love with the idea of being in love, rather than really focussing on what we had in common and thinking about what life might be like together.
Thinking about this some more.... I think a good idea is to talk about "what would we be doing now if we were together?" In other words, share what your "normal" lifestyle and behaviours are (regularly, revisit this more than once) and think actively about how you might gel together in those terms.
I have to admit, I actually think LD has some clear advantages: it forces you to really talk about stuff that Matters. Like children and religion and politics. You can start learning good communication skills together to do with conflict. You can share things about yourself, which you can pay attention to and DO later, when you're together... An example to make myself a little clearer: one person may say one night "I've had a really bad day, I really just wish we could share a snuggle on the couch while I tell you about what's happened", and the other person can store that away in their mind for use in the future, when they might have otherwise brushed off their partner with a brief hug and "it'll be alright".
...I hope I'm making sense :) |
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[ Reply ] |
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Pardon the expression, but ***OMG!*** | by etwas_egal | 2007-09-23 22:19:41 |
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I'm giving you two thumbs up | by purplepineapple | 2007-09-23 22:26:22 |
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The MAIN pitfall, the one with not just lava | by Havoc | 2007-09-24 05:27:55 |
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And that one kept me out, until it went away... | by etwas_egal | 2007-09-24 07:26:48 |
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