on WinXP I can suppress notification when I don't want something. I think it's a checkbox after choosing not to download.
On MacOS X 10.4.4, at least, there's nothing of that sort. I uncheck the box to download, click "update" or "install" or whatever they've named the "ok" button, and the window goes away... first time I did that, I thought that it automatically understood that I didn't have any desire for the software. I was wrong. I've checked everything I've been able to find. The preferences for Software Update are located in the System Preferences, which only allows selection of how often I want to check for updates.
So I'm feeling rather limited in options right now... heh. :)
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