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So, how does one tell | by ts003 | 2005-10-04 06:57:49 |
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An unusual suggestion | by oot | 2005-10-04 10:52:02 |
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....o.O;; wow | by ts003 | 2005-10-04 11:17:38 |
| It's an excellent suggestion, really. |
by bitflipper |
2005-10-04 12:30:58 |
The rules for handling potential conflict and interpersonal tensions don't change all that much from one situation to another; only the cause of the situation changes.
You sound like you're in a situation that could lead to conflict and tension. A young man or woman trying to tell hir parents that s/he has homosexual feelings is similarly in a situation that can lead to conflict and tension. That conflict and tension is what brings about peoples' reactions.
It may seem like people would react to the news they hear, but, in reality, they react to the situation -- to the stress, the disagreement, the confusion, or, even (it has happened), the understanding and the acceptance. The news is just a stimulus to make one aware of the situation.
I'd like to offer one other bit of advise, if I may. Examine your own motives very closely before opening the discussion with your mom. Know what you want, and know why you want it. I'm sure your gut-level reaction is to say "I want her to stop asking me to do things I cannot do." But delve deeper than that. What is it that you really want from your mother as a result of this news you will give her? Understanding your own motivation is a very powerful tool in controling a possible conflict. If nothing else, it lets you know when you can back down, when you can safely ignore some statements, and when you can give in to let the other party feel like they are getting something worthwhile out of all of this stress, too.
Beyond that, I can only wish you best luck. (Having a little luck on your side never hurts. ;-)> ) |
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[ Reply ] |
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thanks. and yeah, will have to. (n/t) | by ts003 | 2005-10-04 13:14:41 |
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