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Q. for gays and lesbians here... | by Illiad | 2004-12-14 09:11:21 |
| I kid alot with one of my wife's best friends |
by BuggedEyes |
2004-12-14 10:59:27 |
and call him all sorts of things, as he calls me all sorts of things back. He'll take us to different places and talk to different people and every group has a different "language" depending on how formal and how familiar they are with me.
What I've learned is that there is no difference in gay synonyms than to say racist ones. If the other person knows exactly what you mean and how you mean it and most importantly the praise/word/slang/perjorative is used meaningfully and in context only, then you just go by the golden rule. Be nice and play nice. I personally would get offended if someone purposefully out of the blue identified me as a "redneck" and that's my new name or group, "redneck". If it's used by someone I know in context and friendly like, I'll think it's funny and at times be proud of it. Being gay is just a adjective, not a noun. Noone is A gay, they just are gay. When asked for a description of someone, I won't even mention the fact since that has no bearing on it.
What I do is ignore the whole "gay" thing and just enjoy each micro-culture as I'm introduced to it. I don't call anyone a queer or a dyke or a gay or a lez. When referring to them I won't even mention it. When referring to abstract groups, queens, dykes, etc may be used but not derogatively. If anyone takes offense, I'll apologize and go on with life. Some people are very touchy and take offense at anything, that's life.
Basically the way I see it is that it's a matter of viewpoint. Act nice, play nice and you won't be sent away for a "time-out".
)8^) |
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