You sound like you both need to cool off a little bit and sit down and talk things over rationally, without getting pissed off again. Sit and talk about why you got angry with each other but don't let that make you angry again. Things come out when you're really good and pissed off that need to come out anyway. If you and your SO can get really torqued up with each other, and then sit down and talk things back over, you're really not doing as bad as you think.

My mom and I tend to fall into this when we can't or don't get an issue out any other way. We can get really mad at each other, and argue at high volume over things. Once we've sat down and cooled off, and collected our thoughts, and we're BOTH ready to address the issue rationally, we'll sit down and talk it over. We always know exactly where each other stands on something, and that's a lot of help. Ideally, we don't get to the really angry arguements, but it's not a sign of complete failure so long as you can make something productive out of it.

Obviously, this has to work for both of you. You have to try to work things out other ways, but sometimes it really turns to sh*t. Don't let it go too long. Say your piece once and be done, hear her piece once and be done. Don't sit there yelling the same thing at each other. Don't call each other names. Just say what needs said, and try to break off the arguement. For my mom and I (and my troublesome room-mate) these things tend to happen when there is an issue that one side or the other or both hasn't spoken their real feelings about. When they fester inside for whatever reason, a big arguement can be very helpful to get them all out.

{{{joecrousoe}}}