Are YOU depressed? Are YOU looking for the meaning of life? Should you be VEGETARIAN or not? What should YOU eat, wear, listen to? Search NO MORE! Our Certified Gurus have the ANSWERS to all your problems. They have studied many old dusty BOOKS of dubious authenticity and written in incomprehensible jargon to find all the answers YOU NEED! Better JOBS, better RELATIONSHIPS, better LIVING through the revelations of TRUE BUDDHISM(tm)! Don't accept any cheap subsitute only TRUE BUDDHISM has the answers YOU NEED! Let's hear for some satisfied customers:
Julie Strasser, 34:
"I didn't know whether I should be vegetarian or not. Boy, did True Buddhism(tm) set me straight or what? Now I know it is a capital sin to eat meat and I have completely banished it from my life. I also now badger all my friends and family to make them all vegetarian too. My social life has never been better! Thanks, True Buddhism(tm)!"
George McFernick, 56:
"Before True Buddhism(tm), one didn't know that using the first person singular pronoun in speech was a sign of spiritual retardation. But now, one knows that and one doesn't use first person singular pronouns anymore. One is very grateful not to be so spiritually retarded. Thanks, True Buddhism(tm)!"
Bernard Dow, 41:
"I used to think that to be a true Buddhist, one had to be vegetarian. Well, I was wrong! True Buddhism(tm) has shown me that true Buddhist are not vegetarian. As shown in the Duhordai Cannon, chapter 32, verse 12-13: "...this lemur shall eat of the left and right cups and no one truly shall even send forth the slightest fart and so it is said...". Which means that true Buddhists may eat meat at will. Thanks, True Buddhism(tm)!"
Do as these satisfied customers did and call NOW.
1-800-TRUE-BUD... that's 1-800-TRUE-BUD
Our Certified Gurus are ready to take your orders. Call NOW!
(This offer is null where valid. Doesn't apply to people, living, dead or otherwise, or to cattle. Not responsible for objects lost, found, lost again, found again and then destroyed. Will ship to continental Kentucky only. We accept GuruCard and NirvanaExpress.
This advertisement was paid for by the Only True Way Corporation.)
|