Linux
Install the latest version of Microsoft Windows.
Learn to love it.
Junkfood
Eat some real food. Something which you can
identify the source of every ingredient, not the point
of manufacture.
Free BSD
The GPL isn't that bad really. Adopt a penguin at
the zoo.
Gaming
Life is not a game. Roll 3D6. On a 4 or more go
out and do something with your life.
Religion
Read "God's Debris" by Scott Adams (yes, the
Dilbert guy)
UNIX
Anything this old must be obselete. Go and install
a nice modern operating system. I hear MSDOS
has come a long way lately.
Windows
Try MacOS X. It's based on UNIX, it has a
smoother UI than Windows and it doesn't suck.
As an extra feature the boxes look nice. [You know what? I wouldn't touch Apple with a 40 metre pole]
vi
Escape Meta Alt Control Shift. [Yeah right -- EMACS FOREVER!]
Politics
Stop caring!
Brand Names
Having a well-known name doesn't make it good.
Computer Games
Stop staring at the screen and get some fresh air.
You should see a doctor about the RSI in your thumbs. [Noooooo... one more game, honest!]
[Was lmao at this one -- I don't follow conspiracy thoery]
Conspiracy Theory
Face it, the elected government is in control.
Actually that's quite scary.
Ultima
If you find one tell us.
Environmentalism
Consume more stuff! It's easier to buy new stuff than to recycle.
Macintosh
Use a mouse with more than one button.
Cars
There just hunks of metal which go real fast. Ride
a bike through London at rush hour.
Viruses you might suffer from:
USA (70%)
Rule, Britannia! Britannia rule the waves! [repeat]
Industrial (70%)
Everyone likes folk. No, really. Maybe you should listen to the Incredible String Band.
8-Bit (90%)
Polygons, all the polygons you can get are not
enough.
Japan (60%)
Big is good. Small is bad. Giant robots would not
make a good last line of defence for Earth.
Sci-fi (60%)
Stop wearing the stick-on ears.
X11 (60%)
I hear Mac OS 10 Aqua is nice at this time of year.
British (65%)
No need for cure. Benign virus.
Hippyism (80%)
Free love is passe and potentially dangerous, and
patchouli smells like cat piss.
Southampton (69%)
Move to the Isle of Wight.
Basically I'm FUBAR. I need a format in their minds ;-P |
