Hello, glad you're feeling better!
I've never had such an experience myself (I'm only 22), but I look foreward to being a father someday and fear miscarriages like every other.
However, if you have any other children, or if you get any other children later, I'd advise that you tell them what happened.
My parents got married in 1970, but failed to make any children. After three years or so, they thought that perhaps something was wrong with one or both of them, and they decided to adopt a child from Korea. They went through all the paper-work, and finally, almost 18 months later, they recieved a letter that said that everything was OK, a baby girl was about to be theirs. However, not many planes flew between Korea and Norway in those days, so they would have to wait just a little while longer. At that moment, the child that could have been my older sister caught pnemonia (sp?) and died. The sad part is, had the sickness come three weeks later, the child would already be in Norway and recieved proper treatment that might have saved her life. That would also have happened if the paperwork had been done just a bit sooner, so the child could have gotten on the plane she was supposed to be on. She would have been 28 years old by now, had she still lived.
I knew none of this untill a few years ago, when somebody of my parents older friends, who themselves adopted a child from Korea a few years later. Then the whole story came out, and I felt down for a while, partly because I could have had a sister, but also because my parents didn't tell me or my older brothers anything.
My oldest brother was born in May 1975, about a year after my could-have-been sister died. He, my other brother and me are all naturals, so it proved in the end that mum and dad worked just fine. The ironic part of this story is that I now HAVE a sister who's adopted from Korea, my sister-in-law. I think both mum and dad really liked that.
Asfrith |
