Now, consider the fact that my response to adiplomat (see A below) was not as dire as he makes out. It was a few questions, somewhat tongue-in-cheek, that were designed to challenge his preconceptions on the assumed "inherent evil" of first posts. The only thing that could be considered objectionable was the subject, "Assuming ignorance..." Ok, if someone wants to slap me for calling him ignorant, go right ahead. As soon as you slap him for calling himoq the same thing. So if it's not nice to question someone's logic, then where are the rules? <sarcasm>I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that everybody should be treated equally.</sarcasm>

Then xcheopis came at me with both barrels. (see B below) She called me either stupid or malicious. Now, is there any question that a personal attack has occurred? (put your hand down, nin_man) The very thing that adiplomat is decrying is what she has done. But does he take her to task for it? Of course not. Does anyone else?

Not that I care. I like xcheopis a lot. She is one of the few people I felt worthy of talking to off the forums. I still feel that way. But I don't see that I have to spare fer feelings when she is the one who has laid the grounds for the discussion, however.

I think my response to her was direct and to the point (see C below). At this point, I was using "bug" affectionately, but that is something quite hard to communicate, so they may have taken it differently. I was counting on our prior off-forum relationship to make that clear. I answered her question precisely. Then I asked her why she thought her question was valid. I also pointed out that her tactic of putting "stupidity" in the subject line was clearly a personal attack and that I had caught the message. Clearly to anyone who knows me, I showed restraint at this point in responding. Had there not been a prior relationship between us (just friends, adiplomat, don't worry), I would have been a bit more explicit.

So her next response (see D below) shows that she really wants to ignore my point, that adiplomat was expressing his personal views, and instead accused me once again of being malicious - not that I mind that designation terribly. I am certainly that way towards bullies, and I have been monitoring adiplomat's posts for a while now. He qualifies. I also admit that I see similarities between myself and him, as others have pointed out, and thus I didn't think there was a need to spare his feelings. He's big enough to dish it out, so he's certainly not entitled to whine when it gets served back. The only thing is, I hadn't taken off the gloves yet. My response to him was quite within acceptable limits. xcheopis was the one blowing it out of proportion. Her parting comment was to reiterate that I was either stupid or malicious. Am I the only one who thinks this is a personal attack?

So, my final response (see E below) indicated my feelings at the same time as I tried to reiterate my position. In slang terms, "bug" is someone who annoys you, which nobody in their right mind can say xcheopis wasn't trying to do. (Shut up, lefties.) "Insect" is someone who is beneath you, and I certainly don't feel that way about xcheopis. Sure, she bugged me, but I still like her. I just wondered why she would so aggressively defend someone who clearly wanted nothing to do with the discussion in the first place. In my experience, that is usually because there is an affectionate relationship between them.

Perhaps I went a wittle too far in pointing this out. If my assertion that she is involved with adiplomat is incorrect or is somehow causing her to feel bad, then I want to say, "I'm sorry." xcheopis, I do not want you to be hurt by my words.

Now, if anyone has somethign else to add to this, please don't start a new thread, keep it here. Or at least go post a nasty personal note in my diary, as someone said. Let's be somewhat mature about this and not spread it around.

_{nin_man and special_ed, if you say anything about my apology being insincere again, you will rightfully regret it.}